A
few months
ago, when I was picking up the children at school, another mother I knew
well rushed up to me. Emily was fuming with indignation.
"Do you know what
you and I are?" she demanded.
Before I could answer,
and I didn't really have one handy, she blurted out the reason for her
question. It seemed she had just returned from renewing her driver's
license at the County Clerk's office. Asked by the woman recorder to
state her occupation. Emily had hesitated, uncertain how to classify
herself.
What I mean is,
"explained the recorder, "Do you have a job, or are you just a
.....?"
"Of course I have
a job," snapped Emily. "I'm a mother."
"We don't list
'mother' as an occupation...'housewife' covers it," said the
recorder emphatically.
I forgot all about her
story until one day I found myself in the same situation, this time at
our own Town Hall. The Clerk was obviously a career woman, poised,
efficient, and possessed of a high-sounding title like official
Interrogator or Town Registrar.
"And what is your
occupation?" she probed.
What made me say it, I
do not know. The words simply popped out.
"I'm a Research
Associate in the field of Child Development and Human Relations."
The clerk paused,
ball-point pen frozen in midair, and looked up as though she had not
heard right. I repeated the title slowly, emphasizing the most
significant words. Then I stared with wonder as my pompous pronouncement
was written in bold, black ink on the official questionnaire.
"Might I
ask," said the clerk with new interest, "just what you do in
your field?"
Coolly, without any
trace of fluster in my voice, I heard myself reply, "I have a
continuing program of research (what mother doesn't) in the laboratory
and in the field (normally I would have said indoors and out). I'm
working for my Masters (the whole darned family) and already have four
credits (all daughters)." "Of course, the job is one of the
most demanding in the humanities (any mother care to disagree?) and I
often work 14 hours a day (24 is more like it).
But the job is more
challenging than most run-of-the-mill careers and the rewards are in
satisfaction rather than just money."
There was an increasing
note of respect in the clerk's voice as she completed the form, stood
up, and personally ushered me to the door.
As I drove into our
driveway, buoyed up by my glamorous new career, I was greeted by my lab
assistants - ages 13, 7, and 3.
Upstairs I could hear
our new experimental model (6 months) in the child-development program,
testing out a new vocal pattern. I felt triumphant! I had scored a beat
on bureaucracy! And I had gone on the official records as someone more
distinguished and indispensable to mankind than "just another
mother."
Motherhood...what a
glorious career. Especially when there's a title on the door.